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The Transition You Don’t See Coming: Caring for Parents and Children at the Same Time


Sandwich

At Fulcrum Wellness Coaching, we often talk about transitions; the ones we anticipate and the ones that catch us by surprise. One of the most challenging and least expected transitions many people face is stepping into the role of dual caretaker, responsible for raising children while also caring for aging parents.

This is the experience of the “sandwich generation,” and it’s reshaping families, workplaces, and wellness in ways we can no longer ignore.

A Growing Reality

This isn’t a small slice of the population anymore—it’s a growing community.

  • Nearly 1 in 4 American adults are now in the sandwich generation, a 50% increase since 2015 (Business Insider, 2025).

  • Among caregivers under age 50, nearly half (47%) are providing for both kids and parent (AARP, 2025).

  • In total, 63 million Americans are family caregivers—a 45% rise in just 10 years (MarketWatch, 2025).

The transition often comes without warning: a sudden medical diagnosis, financial setback, or gradual decline in a parent’s health. Before you know it, you’re managing school pick-ups, soccer schedules, and bedtime routines; while also coordinating doctor’s appointments, medication refills, and difficult financial conversations.

The Toll on Wellness

At Fulcrum, we look at wellness through eight interconnected dimensions. Each one is tested when you’re stretched between two generations:

  • Emotional: Caregivers often feel guilt, anxiety, or grief; never sure if they’re “doing enough” for anyone.

  • Physical: Studies show sandwich caregivers who provide 20+ hours of care weekly experience long-term declines in health, lasting up to eight years (Financial Times, 2025).

  • Financial: With long-term care averaging $111,000 annually (Investopedia, 2025), many families face overwhelming costs, forcing some to cut back work hours or leave jobs entirely.

  • Social: Isolation is common; friends and peers may not understand the depth of the dual responsibility.

  • Occupational: The sandwich generation makes up nearly a quarter of the workforce, many juggling 50+ hours of caregiving weekly in addition to their jobs (Business Insider, 2025).

  • Spiritual, Intellectual, and Environmental: These often take a backseat, leaving little space for growth, rest, or joy when everything feels urgent.

Coping and Centering Your Fulcrum

You may not have chosen this season, but you can still find ways to navigate it with balance and intention:

  1. Map Your Support Create a care map of who does what (i.e., siblings, neighbors, friends). Tools like Lotsa Helping Hands make coordination visible and practical.

  2. Set Compassionate Boundaries Saying “no” doesn’t mean you don’t care. It means you’re preserving energy to sustain care.

  3. Engage Professional Resources A geriatric care manager or financial planner can reduce overwhelm and help you focus on what matters most.

  4. Integrate Micro-Wellness Practices Small daily rituals (i.e., five minutes of journaling, a walk, deep breathing before bed) can protect your wellness across all eight dimensions.

  5. Reframe the Meaning This season, while exhausting, can deepen family bonds. Children watching you care for their grandparents often carry forward values of empathy, resilience, and responsibility.

Fulcrum Perspective

At Fulcrum Wellness Coaching, we believe balance isn’t about perfection; it’s about recognizing when life tilts heavily in one direction and finding small, intentional ways to re-center. Being a dual caretaker may feel like the transition you never saw coming, but it can also become a chapter of resilience and connection when supported with the right tools, boundaries, and mindset.

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